❗Please read my pervious post for this post to make a little more sense.
When meeting a woman you have never met before it does make it much harder to talk to her. You do not know her name or where she’s from. Nothing. This is why it is important to ask the right questions in the right way.
Remember this women you have approached does not know anything about you either. It’s your job to make her feel comfortable enough for her to engage a conversation with you.
Do not expect anything from her!
If she rejects you learn from what you could have done better. Do not take it personally. Some girls are not comfortable talking to strangers due to different cultures, backgrounds and experiences.
Read her body language. If she feels shy or uncomfortable step back a little and point it out you could say “hey there’s no reason to be scared I know it’s random I do not want anything from you, just thought I’d come say hi”.
When approaching girls, guys tend to get so nervous and scripted that they forget how to act normal. They do not notice the little things as mentioned above. I have done these mistakes too.
Okay, I’m going to show you a script of how I talked to girls. Remember this is based on my personality, my energy and the vibe I give. This is why this worked for me and it’s just a little guideline. I never say this word for word I change it up all the time, but this should give you an idea of what to say, how to never run out of things to say and keep the conversation going. I will do a break down of this and explain why I said the things I said in order to take control of the conversation.
While I’m walking…….I see a girl which I find attractive she’s walking towards me. My heartbeat is like oh shitttt say something!
She’s close enough there’s a good distant between us.
KEEP GOOD EYE CONTACT don’t be freaky with it.
I stop her in a non threatening way and I say …
“Excuse me sorry this may be a little random..
I know it’s a little cheeky but I find you attractive. You caught my eye, thought I’d say hello.
You have this Columbian look about you I think it’s the dress hahaha”
She replies “ah no I am actually Greek, but why do I look Columbian?”
(Me)” Yes, may be it’s the dress or just your look it’s not a bad thing. I have a Columbian friend you match her a little.”
“I’ve never been to Greece I really should go. I heard people there really know how to party.”
She replies “They do but most of the time it’s people from other countries doing all the partying. Us Greeks just watch them having a crazy time.”
(Me) “Yh Yh I bet your the one standing on the table singing songs and just acting like you observe”
She replies “hahaha no no I am a good girl”
(Me) “Yh me to I love to behave and not getting too crazy” *saying it with sarcasm and a cheeky smile*
“You have this creative vibe to you in the way you have you chains and the way your look is. You must be an artist or something?”
She replies “Yes, how did you know haha I am studying fashion and design at university it’s my final year”
“How about you are you a student?”
(Me) “Yes I am a student too, I’am doing business. I know I’m boring but for me it’s having the uni experience learning having fun growing.”
She replies” Yes, I totally agree. I love London and I am having so much fun here. When I finish uni am thinking about doing a master too”.
(Me) “Yh, but think you should take a year have a job really take a break before getting in to master. I have a lot of friends who wishes they took a little break before jumping right back in to uni. Just a suggesting you probably already know what you have planned you look like you do at least hahah”
She replies “Yes, I was actually thinking of working for a little bit then go back in to it later on”
(Me) “Yh, you should do that. But listen I have to go, I have some friends waiting for me and I’m getting late. We should hang out sometime. I enjoyed our little conversation”
She replies “Yh, sure that would be good”
(Me) “I forgot to even ask your name my name is MB”
She replies “My name is Anna”
Take her details, give her a hug and leave.
Text her with your name. I do it right away.
If you notice I do not directly ask the question to her. Instead I make an assumption. It sounds much better that way and it does not sound like an interview. It does not matter if you are right or wrong, as either way she will give you the information. It is good to make a good assumption based on the observation as when you are right you can really connect with her. Because if you are right it intrigues her even more and if you are wrong she’ll just correct you. Nevertheless, the information you needed comes out without you having to interview her.
It sounds much better than this.
“Where are you from?” she replies “Greece“
Me “Oh okay. what do you do?”
She replies “I am a student”
Do you see how boring this conversation already sounds and you are only reading this. Imagine for her it does not intrigue her and makes you sound very boring even though you could be a very fun guy with amazing personality. This is why using assumptions keep the conversation more fun. Even when you guess wrong she could either laugh or be offended but it still gets the conversation going.
Don’t just go out making random assumptions really slow down take time to observe. Do not rush! When you’re talking to her you are not on a timer and make sure you make smart observations, like I said if you are wrong it does not matter.
This is how you ask the questions you want in a smarter and less generic way. As you can see from the script one of my assumptions was wrong but I still managed to get the information I wanted. However, my second assumption was correct and the conversation got deeper.
You do not always have to use assumptions. As you get deeper into the conversation, if you can relate to her or add anything with similar experiences do it. Start having a normal conversation like you would with a friend.
As you can see I also give advice at the end about her Masters. I would do that for any friend also. In her eyes it’s a good gesture and people always love hearing things from peoples experiences. It also shows that I am I’m listening to what she is saying.
She also asked me a question I answered, but if you noticed most of the conversation is all about her and that’s the way I prefer it to be. The less they know about me the better. It’s always good to remain a mystery it entices them to go on a date and find out more about you. Remember women actually do like a good listener.
I also throw in a little jokes but that’s just my personality. I love to have banter like to see if a girl can handle jokes because that’s a trait I find attractive and if she is the girl that I want to see.
It’s always good to be clear about your intention when talking to a girl that you’ve never met because some girls could just think you are being friendly and this can land you in the friend zone.
When I feel like the conversation is getting long enough I normally cut it short as its good to save some for when you meet again. At the time of the conversation I was actually busy but it’s also good to have a time restraint as you don’t want her thinking that you’re only there to pick up girls and you actually have friends that you need to see.
If I wasn’t busy I would have invited her for a drink there and then and just taken on a date from there.
The conversation was quite good and we went straight into the conversation from the first assumption I made and therefore forgot to ask each other our names. At the end when I asked for her number I also gave her my phone at the same time this encourages them even more to give their number.
I always give a hug at the end it’s good to get them familiar with your touch at an early stage rather than you randomly touching her on a date.
It is very difficult to put picking up women in an article maybe in the future I could run a Boot Camp and give proper examples.
Stay tuned for more post.