My OCD stories

My solution to My OCDs

❗Please read my pervious post for this post to make a little more sense.

With all the OCDs I had I eventually managed to to figure out how to stop nearly all of them. Everything from my tapping OCD to my two step OCD, it did not matter what OCD it was this worked for all of them.

Let me explain.

I started to realise whenever an OCD occurred I would always act on that OCD straight away. I had no self control, I used to rely on the tapping OCD for nearly everything I did. I started to work on my self by self healing and re-evaluating everything in my life. I researched how to have a clear mindset, not let you anxiety overcome you and I looked at what motivated me in life. I started doing things which made me happy and surrounded myself around people who made me happy.

Because I started to notice the OCD was fed by negativity and having bad thoughts. In order for me to move forward, I had to cancel out the negatives from my life. For many people this could be bad influences in life, alcohol etc. However, in my case the problem was me. I made things complicated for myself by overthinking as it made me do my OCD as a way of helping myself into thinking “By doing this OCD the outcome of whatever I about to face or do will be better”.

After this reoccurring trapped feeling I started to realise that I allowed it to happen and was relying on this as a way of creating good things in my life. This was not the way to live and instead I stared to get closer to God. I know you’re probably thinking here we go again another saved by God story, but it’s not. I wanted to find ways to overcome it because I just wanted to feel normal and was frustrated with all my anxiety and OCD. I came to this conclusion as I was late one evening and a friend was waiting for me and due to my OCD I was late. He was not happy and it was not nice making him wait. I started to realise how bad the OCD was and how controlling it was and how it started to affect the people around me. That was when I said to myself “Enough is enough I need to figure out a way to stop this.”

I am not very religious, even though I try to be, but it’s much bigger than that. You don’t have to be religious I just use it as it worked for me. Getting to the point I started to rely on God for my good outcomes and whenever an OCD trigger occurred or I was having a bad thought, which could trigger more OCDs. No matter how bad it got I said to myself I will try to have a good day stay positive and let God handle the rest.

Now the bigger picture is not religion it’s more about letting the universe and destiny do its job. If you really think about it you have no clue about the future the only power you have is to be the best you and love yourself, have confidence and stay positive in order to go through anything and come out the other end still intact.

There where times I had bad days, but those bad days were much better without my OCD. It was a big improvement! However, it’s not easy to just change everything over night. I still did some OCDs, it’s like smoking you have to cut it down slowly. This eventually helped me and in present time I barely haven OCD or anxiety.

I’ll tell you a recent story where I felt anxiety and felt like doing my OCD to stop it from happening. My dad recently got sick he was sent to the hospital my brain instantly went “Oh no, this is your fault if you did your OCD he would have been fine.” I know it sounds stupid, right, but that’s what my brain was telling me. My thoughts started to tell me to do my OCD, this could be tapping on things or stepping in and out of the room in order for my dads situation to be better and by some chance doing my OCD would help the situation.

I could feel my anxiety building up inside but I took a deep breath and said to myself “I am in control I need to stay positive and call home and be supportive, be there with family”. I stayed calm and did not use my OCD. I even made a prayer to God to look over my dad and keep him in good health.

A few hours went by and the doctor tells us the blood test results and the cause for why he was admitted into the hospital was due to his age he had a bad stomach congestion and a lot of gas was trapped, which caused him a lot of pain and that he would be fine if he just took some laxatives. His blood test results came out perfectly fine.

I realised, all this time ever since I was a little child I would let these thought and urges get in the way of me living my life. It took me a lot of my life to realise that things which happen good or bad are not due to my OCD and when bad things happen it’s not my fault and when good things happen I actually deserve them and it’s not because my OCD allowed them to happen.

That being said I know I am much stronger now. A lot of people struggle with OCD and I would be more than happy to talk and help find a solution as I did not have anyone to talk to and I know if I did I might have been better a long time ago. Instead it took me a long time but I just talked to myself to come up with a solution to my OCD.

If this doesn’t help you in any way, shape or form I can promise you there is definitely a way to make this better. You have to be honest with your self and take a leap of faith. I know it’s very difficult to even try stopping your OCD.

I know whatever OCD you might have there is always a solution to each and every OCD no matter how bad it is and no matter how trapped you feel. I never had anyone to talk about this with and I felt trapped for about 13 years. This platform has given me the chance to express myself. If you can relate or know people going through similar situations, I can promise and reassure you I have found a solution that has helped me in my day to day life. This solution came from 13 years of experience with OCD. You are not alone and if you wish to contact me please contact me on ask.millennial@hotmail.com. Hopefully my solution could help find your solution.

If you want to get professional help you can get psychological therapy normally cognitive behavioural therapy or you can get medication such as antidepressants called selective serotonin repute inhibitors (SSRIs).

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My OCD stories

How to cope with OCD on your bad days

❗Please read my pervious post for this post to make a little more sense.

When I am having a bad day having OCD does not help! It’s like having an over dramatic frantic friend with you at all times. Whenever I am having a bad day my thoughts make me think it’s due to my OCD. For example, if I had not tapped correctly and missed a sequence of numbers when tapping or I did my OCD routine incorrectly something bad could happen. This is when my OCD takes me on overdrive.🤯

Let me explain.

A bad day for me is when everything is just going bad I even have some bad days of the week, Thursdays and Mondays. On these days where I feel like am going to have a bad day my OCD really takes advantage of that as the negativity feeds it. These days could consists of all kinds of things just not going right, such as having arguments with friends and family, extra pressure and unnecessary drama I even lost a job on a Thursday. Things just happen to pile up one after another.

(Bonus OCD😅) Another bizarre OCD -I will not were the same shirt or socks which I was wearing on that bad day anymore as I feel like they had a negative energy from them which made me have a bad day. If you are thinking do I have lucky clothing such as tops and other clothing the answer is Yes.

The reason why my OCD takes advantage is because I have to make sure everything bad which is about to happen is not going to get really bad. When doing my OCD it helps get rid of that anxiety and heaviness. I could therefore be tapping or doing other OCDs for a really long time just to make sure my day is not worse than it has to be.

Sometimes my OCD is so controlling that I will not look at texts or check emails just incase they are bad. I just want to isolate and lock myself away from the outside world with no contact with anyone. I know you’re probably thinking I am the dramatic and frantic one.

But over a long period of time you start to get used to it, like I have. Here’s a tip always remain positive no matter how bad it is. Otherwise, you will lose yourself in your thoughts and you will never be able to move forward. If you keep getting stuck OCD feeds off of the negativity.

Here’s a trick I use

When your OCD is not playing up as much use that good day and remember it on your bad day and think everything worked out fine on the good day. Use this to help you move forward and make it a little less difficult.

I know whatever OCD you might have there is always a solution to each and every OCD no matter how bad it is and no matter how trapped you feel. I never had anyone to talk about this with and I felt trapped for about 13 years. This platform has given me the chance to express myself. If you can relate or know people going through similar situations, I can promise and reassure you I have found a solution that has helped me in my day to day life. This solution came from 13 years of experience with OCD. You are not alone and if you wish to contact me please contact me on ask.millennial@hotmail.com. Hopefully my solution could help find your solution.

If you want to get professional help you can get psychological therapy normally cognitive behavioural therapy or you can get medication such as antidepressants called selective serotonin repute inhibitors (SSRIs).

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My OCD stories

My two step OCD (15 years old)

Check out my first post to see how my OCD started.

When you have a weird OCD like mine it makes things you enjoy off putting. An example would be when I was young, I would not bother playing with my toys as I knew if I picked them up it would trigger my OCD again. Another example would be not bothering to get up to get a drink, which takes me to an OCD which I call the Two step OCD. Now before you think my OCD is a step up routine.

Let me explain.

Now this OCD would affect me when I would walk from one room to another. Every time I entered a new room in the house I would step in and out of the room until I got the feeling right (ps it did help my two step get better) also amazing leg calf work out .

I felt like I had to get this feeling right in order to go into the next room. It was almost like a game in my head, where I had to pass levels to get to the next stage. As you can imagine this really made me lazy and stressed as I preferred not getting up anymore.

Before I continue let’s talk about The feeling” I keep talking about.

The feeling is a nervous feeling, and it makes me feel like something bad is going to happen in my life. This could be being embarrassed in school, my dad getting angry at me or that something I was working towards would not happen. There is a bundle of thoughts which occur in the mind telling you that if you do not do this right a lot of bad things will happen and this feeling would occur in all my OCDs.

Now, you are probably thinking “How do you make this feeling go away? How do you know you did it correctly?” The answer to your question is the only way I knew I did it correctly was when the anxiety and the heaviness in my body went away. This way I got reassurance that it was fine, but this was not always the case. There have been situations where I felt like I did it right and I could relax. But then one minute later I would have thoughts like “Are you sure you did it right? What if you didn’t do it right and something bad happens? You should try again!”

Yes, it’s very complicated but it started to become a growing part of my life and second nature. It became so natural for me that I didn’t even notice it at times. The strange thing was, I found a loophole to get it to stop. But this loophole was not the solution but sometimes it worked. When people started to notice, it would stop immediately like the Game was Over because i got embarrassed. However, this rarely happened as it was not that obvious and my family didn’t pay much attention to it.

Thank you for reading. This was the two step OCD. I have to be honest I didn’t come up with the name. I know it’s strange naming the OCD, but the name actually originated when my sister In law saw me do it. Like I said it becomes second nature to me. I don’t realise who is around me, as I zone into it and when she saw it she said “Why are you two stepping?” and that’s how it was named.

I know whatever OCD you might have there is always a solution to each and every OCD no matter how bad it is and no matter how trapped you feel. I never had anyone to talk about this with and I felt trapped for about 13 years. This platform has given me the chance to express myself. If you can relate or know people going through similar situations, I can promise and reassure you I have found a solution that has helped me in my day to day life. This solution came from 13 years of experience with OCD. You are not alone and if you wish to contact me please contact me on ask.millennial@hotmail.com. Hopefully my solution could help find your solution.

If you want to get professional help you can get psychological therapy normally cognitive behavioural therapy or you can get medication such as antidepressants called selective serotonin repute inhibitors (SSRIs).

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Two Step OCD